It's 11 o'clock on a Friday night. Baby is asleep and life is good. Everyone likes to unwind after a long day... some people enjoy a glass of wine, a nice cold beer, maybe even a nice fat joint...mmj of course ;)
My vice is Hot Cheetos. Honestly, just about any neon colored chip. I LOVE Hot Cheetos. Like Pee Wee Herman why-don't-you-marry-them love them. I love all cheetos. I even have the cheeto commercials saved on my Youtube fav's.
I know they're bad. I make myself do like 40 hail mary's after I eat them.
My love for hot cheetos started in middle school, 7th grade to be exact. 6th grade was pretty depressing, but 7th grade was incredible! They opened a new middle school (junior high as my man would say) and it like going to school in Bevery Hills- flowers and fountains and tv's in the class rooms. It was awesome. During lunch, one of the teachers would bring out this rolling cart full of stuff kids love...candy, lollipops, little debbies, you name it. Granola moms would've crapped their organic panties if they knew all the junk that teacher was selling. And everything was 5 for a dollar. I'm pretty sure it was to fund their after school happy hour.
Anyway, it was like Christmas everyday. I would get a bag of hot cheetos and a gourmet lollipop that would inevitably fall and break before I could put a dent in it.
My sister shares this love of hot cheetos with me. Every time we get together, it's like when old friends binge drink, talking about the good ol' days. Except we binge on hot cheetos. A sandwich just isn't the same with out a nice side of neon red deliciousness.
I know they're full of addicting red 40 and blue 30 and god knows what other brain tricking excitotoxins. I don't want my son to ever eat them because I'm pretty sure they're as addicting as meth.
I want to rid myself of this addiction. I'm just not ready to let them go yet. We don't do dairy, we hardly ever eat beef, we don't eat bacon, 95% of everything in our house is organic, we drink fresh juice everyday...we're doing alright.
So I don't need an intervention, I already know. But don't be too mad at me- we had fresh pressed juice for dinner, again. Hey, I told you I wasn't perfect...I've got my own struggles going on here ok.
What I do need is for the frito lay and cheeto lay and all the other neon chip makers to please, please figure out a way to make non chemical, GMO free chips. And make 'em gluten free while you're at it! I know there are millions of people who would love to eat them.
If Redbull can have some guy free fall from outer space, then I know they can make healthy hot cheetos.
Or at least a hot cheeto flavored rice cake. Please, just some sort of red, delicious, crunchy something that can cure me from this addiction. I'm trying really hard to eat clean and blah, blah, blah. I don't beat myself up over a bag of hot cheetos every once in awhile.
And it wasn't even my fault... if Target would've had the rice chips 2 for $3 like the cheetos, I obviously would've bought them instead.
Idk I've you've seen this- but watch this dude literally free fall from outerspace. I know it's long but it's TOTALLY worth it. Happy Friday.